SWW 03-30-11

So What If:

• its 830 and dinner is just now being cooked
• I have to go get my new couch in the morning and our 2 couches are still sitting in the living room
• its 830 and I have to move our 2 couches and still eat dinner and get up by 7 in the am
• if my favorite movie is called "everybody's baby: the rescue of Jessica McClure"
• not only is the above my favorite movie but that I have newspaper clippings and have watched almost every news story on her throughout her life.
• it's now 10 and I havent finished this blog
• my 2 favorite days of the week is Wed. & Thurs. b/c of So what wednesday and Greys anatonmy
• secretly I was estatic that is was storming this morning so that my honey stayed home (i miss him when he's gone)
• I have only dated 2 men and I married the second one!!!

SO WHAT WEDNESDAY!!!!

I have seen a lot of these and I am going to start doing this!!! So I am saying SO WHAT to...

• I miss my husband terribly when he is at the church working two days a wee
• I still havent completely unpacked after moving in almost 6 months ago (I have at least 10 yrs b4 we move)
• I am selling Mary Kay right now mostly for the 50% discount I get personally
• I can't wait until Extreme Couponing comes on TLC
• I just realized that I wrote the wrong wedding date in our guest book (hey I think I did it on our wedding day)
• I make my husband snuggle in the morning when he is a get up and go get 'em type guy

Anyways I hope yall enjoy this and I will have to figure it how to link this up with some other bloggers who do So What Wednesdays!!

Becoming,,,

What I know two posts in one day, I know, I know shocker but just hang on and enjoy. This weekend has been our womens conference at our church and we have tomorrow left. I will say that I was more challenged tonight thant any other speaker. (no I am not biased about the speaker(she was my pastors wife)) Kristen really challenged me tonight to adopt an orphan (defined as those who have not yet believed in God) and that my orphan could be my neighbors or coworkers. Well I am sitting there thinking my immediate neighbors are my amazing inlaws and this incredible christian couple and their 12 kids. We than have two more neighbors at the front of our driveway (we live on a private drive and have 4 neighbors by us we are at the end though) I have meet only one of those and it was under pleasant bad circumstances; more to come on that. While the others I havent meet yet. And if you dont already know its been almost a year since I have worked. So tonight I sat there thinking who is my orphan? So of course God picks the one neighbor that was met under the circumstance. What makes it so hard about this neighbor is that the ony encounter I had with them was the day that He smacks into the side of our van with his lawnmower and gets off and starts cussing me out and yelling at me (again he smacked into us) and it ended causing over 1300 dollars of damage to our car and only about 400 dollars damage to his lawn mower and yelling at us called at that time my future fil and tried to blame it all on me and than getting off the phone continues to yell at me and this continues for a couple of minutes until jeremy (who he adores) is like this is my fiance and i dont appreciate how you are talking to her and of course than his whole tone and attitude changed now that I am not just some worker of Jeremys. So to say the least sometimes being nice to him is the easiest thing or the first thing to come to me. So know God is working on the resentment I feel towards to him. This should be interesting.

Blahhh!

I have felt kinda blah the past week and a half. I am glad that I have my blog where I can be real and if you dont like it dont read it. Here I can express things that I need to get off my chest. The past few weeks it is really hitting me hard that I am not pregnant yet. I know its only been about 5 1/2 months since we got married but we basically have been trying since day 1. We already knew that it would be almost impossible to get pregnant by ourselfs but we serve a big God and having a baby isnt a big thing for God. He can do anything He can give my husband and I baby right now or He could have given us one right after we got married. I cant even tell you how many pregnancy tests I have taken in 5 months and I know it should be what like 5 one fore each month.... but I have always heard you want to take two at a time to be sure and usually its two different brands. Of course taking two a couple of different times a month because I would convince myself its just been too soon to tell so I would take them a little closer or after I should have had a period and every time they came out negative or AF came to visit it would just break my heart. It scares me at times because there are two things I have wanted in life since as far back I can remember and that was to be married (and I am married to my absolute best friend in the world) and to be a mommy. Of course my plans have would have been to meet Jeremy when I was 17 or 18 get married right away after highschool and to have babies right away but God had other things for us to do before we got married and I wouldnt trade it for anything in the world (by the way I know my grammar is impeccable to be desired but dont judge me today). I know I know people are probably like well you knew going in that you would have a hard time getting pregnant if you could naturally but we just really believe that God will heal him (my hubby) and give us the baby(ies) we desire to have. We have the names picked out even have a few little onsies. It woudl also thrill my in laws as of right now we are their hope of having grandbabies and they my mil is so ready to have grandbabies and to be honest my parents (especially my dad) would be thrilled with a little grandson. Regardless they will be happy whether its a boy or a girl. I just cant wait until its my turn and I get to announce that I am expecting and we are going to have a baby. While I have some feeligns on when it really is in Gods hands and while that should give me peace I wish it could just be the old fashioned way, because lets face it it is really cool thinking that out of the most intimate gift God can give two people comes the miracle of life and yet that has been robbed from my husband and I. While Jeremy has had more time to deal with the reality of the possiblity of never being able to have a child biological I havent had as much time, now dont get me wrong this is in no way a deal breaker for us. I knew full well that we would probably never have children naturally well before we got married in fact it was before we even began dating he felt that he needed to be open with me about it. I know we serve a big God and He alone can heal what is broken to create our little babies between the two of us and if we needto have our babies thru adoption our hearts are more than open to that. Although I struggle sometimes with while it is definitely something I have always thought about it makes me sometimes second guess if that is my hagar and ishmel. I dont want to try and help God out. I know that God will help us decide the right time to pursue fertility specialist and or adoption at the right time.

Grandma Katie?!

Confusing title I know considering to be a grandma you have to have children first and we havent been married long enough to even have children. However we do claim our animals as our four legged children before we put Molly outside we had two stray cats that came to visit and our littlest cat Lily and the male stray cat apparently visited a little to well. In the past couple of weeks I have noticed a rounder belly and more time spent on our back porch sleeping. Right now she is sitting in our animal carrier sleeping (very unusual for her). I would guess that sometime in the next couple of weeks we will be having kittens. So I will be a grandma. Shortly after though be looking for a free kittens post. Jeremy says he will be sad happy to see them go.

On other news, I haven't been sticking to my self-committment to blog everyday. I have been doing much better about blogging and keeping it up. While its been hit and miss with blogging I have done much better with doing my devotions every morning and taking my vitamins which I have to admit makes a big difference in how I feel. I feel like my day is in order more and that I have better successful day with starting it right with my time with God.


The atkins change has kinda gotta thrown out the window. We are changing it up a little by adding more fruits and vegetables and yogurt. We still have pretty much elminated all the sugar in our lives and still most of our carbs like breads and pasta and we also eliminated most of the caffine in our lives with the exception of our morning cup of coffee. We do feel better already with just adding the vitamins and eliminating what we have. It really has made a difference with how I feel. I especially love the difference the B-12 I have been taking. It really boosts my energy. I was having a lot of problems getting up in the morning on time and it was a real struggle no matter how much or how little sleep I got. It made no difference. Well I have been taking the B-12 for about 10 days and everyday I have been sleeping better and been able to get up on time and even early and our mornings have been running even more smoothly. 

In my daily Bible reading I finished Esther and started reading Job and all I can say is maybe we should be a little thankful for the troubles in our lives if we know we have been following God's plan for our lives. Job was a righteous and that was the whole just of why he had everything happen. He was a righteous man that honored God and satan didn't believe he would continue to honor God when everything was taken away and basically he lost everything except for his life. His wife even told him just curse God and die. I mean what was she thinking. I am really learning a lot about Job and although I have known the story my whole life reading it again as an adult and having gone thru what I have it makes me wonder if I have done everything to still honor God in everything I dealt with. Well this is all for now I have taken more than enough of your time to read this. Until next time;

Katie

Are you Trusting?

Today sitting out on the back porch doing my devotions, I started reading Proverbs 3. I read a Proverbs a day. In Proverbs 3 it has the famous verses "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not into your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6). This morning especially it made me think and ask myself "Do I really trust God with all my heart or do I lean on my own understanding  and try to do it myself? Do I acknowledge Him in everything and let Him direct my paths? Or more often do I try to control it myself and make it happen myself. I challenged myself today to really trust God more and to acknowledge Him in everything I do.


I also started reading the book Esther yesterday and I am just amazed again as I am always with Esther. To really realize what this young woman went thru and when she was taken from her home and forced to live in the palace and go thru all the beauty processes, knowing that it came down to a night with the king and not just a night of talking and reading it was a night of sex and as a young Jewish girl to know that she was going to have to compromise her innocence and her purity and most likely not be chosen to be queen. To know that after that one night she might just be the kings whore (in today's language) that her only job very well might have been for the rest of her life to please the king in such a manner at his beck and call and to never have a family was heartbreaking I am sure for her. But She trusted God with all her heart and and even though it wasn't in her understanding to surrender that to give up most of her most highly prized (I am sure) to do something that she only imagined doing in the confines of her humble marriage to a typical Jewish man. I think that her life was summed up very well in what her cousin Mordecai said in Esther 4:14 "Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this" Esther had to endure and trust in God all the way so that she was in place in the palace in order to save her people the Jews from Haman's plan to kill all the Jews.

Spring into the New

So I am a day behind on my committment to blog everyday. Yesterday Jeremy and I kinda started doing atkins and we are kinda faltered towards the end of yesterday as I need to do some major grocery shopping and than we can really kick it off with the right foods. Although we kinda dropped the ball there I have been able to keep myself going with a personal goal and that is to get up and read my bible every morning before I start my day off. It has been wonderful to get up and before my day gets going. It has really been great to sit on my back porch and read my bible and drink my coffee. It has been great having my time with Jesus in the morning and get my day going the right way. I feel more productive with everything and I am able to accomplish what I need to. I want to start blogging a lot of what I feel like God is speaking to me as well and what I can share.

My verse today was

Psalm 45:13  "The royal daughter is all glorious within the palace;

Her clothing is woven with gold." NKJV


As a believer in God and He being the King of Kings that makes me a royal daughter. It means that I am glorious and that while my physical clothes of course arent woven in gold I am a precious daughter of the king. and I live a very blessed life by being obedience to God's will to the best of my ability and to honor Him in all I do.